It’s crazy in this lifetime how often your initial gut feeling about someone can be right. For example, I could have predicted back in April as I was sitting in a bar talking to you that I would be writing this about you now.
From the moment you stole my phone that night and told me to stop drunkenly texting another guy I was after and talk to you instead, I knew you were going to be the one to really break my heart. I could have told you right then and there how this was going to go: I’d let you pursue me, I’d start to like you back, I’d start to have real feelings for you, and when it started to show that I cared, that I was invested, you would disappear.
At first I did everything to resist you. When you started trying to talk to me on Facebook and I gave you seemingly vague responses? I was trying not to encourage anything on purpose because I knew if I started talking to you I would fall for you. But I don’t think it was a secret to anyone that I asked our mutual friends about you all the time. I’d be a dirty liar if I said I didn’t ask them to invite you to go places with us. Just so I could see you again.
And when we did finally see each other again at the beginning of the summer I was surprised by how sweet and genuinely nervous you were around me. I liked that I made you nervous. It meant that you were as into me as I was into you. I was relieved when you stole my number from our friends and started texting me. I was excited when you asked me to go to your friend’s wedding as your date. We hardly knew anything about each other then, but for some reason I trusted you.
You were easy to trust because you were easy to talk to. And you were easy to talk to because you were so honest about everything. I liked that we talked about what was happening between us, because it really wasn’t a secret. I liked that I never had to second guess if you liked me or not. I just knew. And you knew.
You have no idea how much I appreciated you doing things just to make me happy. Like taking me to a movie for our first date that you definitely didn’t want to see. Or cleaning my shoes off when they got muddy. Or letting me put drinks on your tab at the bar when I lost a dice game and had to buy everyone shots. And that time you just decided to drop everything and come visit me on the 4th of July. I wish I could tell you now how much that meant to me and how much fun I had doing all of those things with you. It’s the little things that girls remember. Read the rest of this entry